For in this light, one has not really failed just merely undershot a bit. And doesn't that seem so much better than failing? Indeed, it does, kind reader! But, if you were to criticize me on said point then you would not be a very “kind reader,” now would you? For is it not the act of reading and being positive about what has been written precisely what it is to be a kind reader? Yes, I should think so. As a matter of fact, this reminds of a very particular point, indeed! A most important one, a point so pungent that it may very well decide the entire worth of this particular piece of writing. The point, of course, being “pungent” made absolutely no sense in the context of that sentence. Did you get that? Of course, you did. Exactly, why, you are both a good and kind reader. Oh, but on with success! Y'know, success, the very thing that has been eluding me in extrapolating upon the point I wish to convey to you. For example, in the nearly twenty years I have been running this museum, I have yet to make a single dime off of it. In considering this, can a project that never yields a profit but which I must invest a small sum and considerable time into truly be considered a success? Well, in my opinion, the value of something need not be monetary. For example, you my good, kind, and fair-

minded reader must have found some value in it. I mean, otherwise, you would not have taken the time to read this, would you? Also, with respect to myself, the author of its creation, I think any good project which yields no profit may still be regarded as successful so long as it helps its originator stay sane. Now, whether this project has been successful to this end it is, perhaps, to early to say, and only time will tell. Que sera, sera, okay, sure, whatever— we're all mad here, Lenwood S. Sharpe, Director Lumberwoods, Unnatural History Museum Parts Unknown, The Woods, U.S.A.